by Ai Lian Lim,
via Creative Reporter[photo source: Baby Blues]



Have you had anyone try to convince you of your "mistake" in opting to be a Stay-At-Home-Parent? Do you end up feeling low after they remind you of all the accomplishments you have decided to give up?

It is sad that many people think that being a SAHP is a death sentence to a person's talents, education and success. It grieves me even more when a woman, especially one who is a mother, adopts that kind of thinking.

How can we (SAHP) raise above this negativity and senseless talk? Believe in the following instead:

Parenting is NOT for no-brainers. It not only requires much talent and education, it also gives opportunities to create more talent and education that cannot be offered or found even in the best educational insititutions. Caring for another being is not a job to be taken lightly.

Do not look backwards and ponder on the "what ifs". Look forward and focus on the "what can be."

Success is measured in more than one way. Believe that what you are doing is worth more than money, gold, fame, power etc.... You are investing in people and relationships which is of far greater worth.

Occasional set backs do not make you a failure. It does not erase past achievements and do not define who you are. There was a time in my life I would feel like such a loser whenever I lost a tournament or had a bad round of golf. I felt pressured as I believe I didn't live up to other people's expectations. It was then that my father taught me a very valuable lesson. He reminded me that a bad day or a bad tournament does not make me a lesser person. I was still me with titles to my name and opportunities to do better.
And so it is with being a SAHP. We have our bad days and our challenges. People may not think very highly of what we do. BUT it does not make us a lesser person. You are still you with all your past achievements, potentials and a future that is still very bright.

There is a time and season for everything. This is the chapter in your life that spells "FAMILY". There is nothing wrong with that and nothing to be ashamed of. Plus, it is not the last chapter in your life.

Remember the following quotes:

"What happens in your house is more important than what happens in the White House" - Barbara Bush.

"No other success can compensate for failure in the home" - David O. McKay

People, we need more happy parents in this world. Stop the negative talk, the belittling and the put downs. I say with much conviction that I am a happy SAHM! Don't try to convince me otherwise.

Ai was a national golfer who gave up the medals and jet setting lifestyle to experience the wonders of motherhood. She currently owns http://valuebookshop.com, a children's bookstore for parents in Malaysia and Singapore.