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News & Updates
by Michelle Donahue Hillison on April 25, 2008
Yesterday I was driving home after some errands when I saw numerous police vehicles, lanes blocked and all sorts of activity. I thought for sure it was an major accident or a huge drug bust as I sat there stalled in traffic.
One driver who was stuck in traffic actually got out and yelled at the cop for blocking the lanes. The cop quickly and strongly dismissed him. That peaked my interest even more what the hubbub was about.
Soon after I saw the hearse, a funeral perhaps but this was a lot for that. A car with flags, followed by a motorcycle contingent of National Guard and other vets came by and I realized it was the escort from the airport to the funeral home for a local soldier killed in Iraq.
I'd read his father's remarks in the newspaper and all I could think of is that in that hearse was someone's son. In the obituary, no siblings were mentioned - it was someone's only child.
I'm not going to debate this war here but since I've become a parent, my ability to deal rationally with scenes like this has gone out the door. I rarely want to watch horror movies anymore. Sad stories make the tears flow openly. I have to ask my husband to fast forward on the news sometimes because I just can't handle some things.
I just sat in my car and cried.
One driver who was stuck in traffic actually got out and yelled at the cop for blocking the lanes. The cop quickly and strongly dismissed him. That peaked my interest even more what the hubbub was about.
Soon after I saw the hearse, a funeral perhaps but this was a lot for that. A car with flags, followed by a motorcycle contingent of National Guard and other vets came by and I realized it was the escort from the airport to the funeral home for a local soldier killed in Iraq.
I'd read his father's remarks in the newspaper and all I could think of is that in that hearse was someone's son. In the obituary, no siblings were mentioned - it was someone's only child.
I'm not going to debate this war here but since I've become a parent, my ability to deal rationally with scenes like this has gone out the door. I rarely want to watch horror movies anymore. Sad stories make the tears flow openly. I have to ask my husband to fast forward on the news sometimes because I just can't handle some things.
I just sat in my car and cried.
Permalink: Someone's only child
Tags:
parenting
iraq+soldier+death
Trackback: http://publish.creative-weblogging.com/publish/mt-tb.pl/121286
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Vote for Someone's only child:
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Rating: 5.25 out of 16 vote(s) cast.
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Response from:
Proud Father
(04/24/08 9:44pm)
Response from:
Proud Father
(04/24/08 10:14pm)
For the record, here is what his father said in the paper:
"He wouldn't trade being there [on the current assignment] for anything in the world," his father said.
His parents must be so proud of him. God Bless them for raising such a caring person.
"He wouldn't trade being there [on the current assignment] for anything in the world," his father said.
His parents must be so proud of him. God Bless them for raising such a caring person.
Response from:
Michelle Donahue Hillison
(04/24/08 11:24pm)
You are actually making a COMPLETELY incorrect assumption about how I feel about this. Perhaps you should have asked before you snarled at me.
I honor his service and I support the troops. However anytime someone dies there it is sad - whether they wanted to be there or not. His death is SAD, even more so because he was a brave young man.
ANYTIME someone loses their son it is something to grieve. Grief doesn't detract from his service, that doesn't detract from the young man's efforts. I'm sure his family is grieving immensely right now, right along with their pride.
I actually said I wasn't going to debate the war because I didn't want this to turn into a bashing of the president, the war or anything. I just wanted to honor the loss of a child.
I have friends who have served in both Afghanistan and Iraq. I've sent many a care package, letter and email.
I thought the procession was an amazing gesture and I cried because someone DIED. Nowhere here did I rail about the war or the servicemen. I mourned for a family for the loss of their son.
That's not anti or pro-war, that's honoring grief.
I honor his service and I support the troops. However anytime someone dies there it is sad - whether they wanted to be there or not. His death is SAD, even more so because he was a brave young man.
ANYTIME someone loses their son it is something to grieve. Grief doesn't detract from his service, that doesn't detract from the young man's efforts. I'm sure his family is grieving immensely right now, right along with their pride.
I actually said I wasn't going to debate the war because I didn't want this to turn into a bashing of the president, the war or anything. I just wanted to honor the loss of a child.
I have friends who have served in both Afghanistan and Iraq. I've sent many a care package, letter and email.
I thought the procession was an amazing gesture and I cried because someone DIED. Nowhere here did I rail about the war or the servicemen. I mourned for a family for the loss of their son.
That's not anti or pro-war, that's honoring grief.
Response from:
meretisa
(04/24/08 11:44pm)
Dear Proud Father,
I'm sure she wasn't putting down the son's patriotism. She was merely stating that it hit home for her that someone had lost their child. Jeez. Loosen up. Of course his parents are proud of him... all parents are proud of their children.
Michelle,
I understand completely. Since having my own child I've become highly sensitive to such things as well. I think it's a good thing to be sensitive in this desensitized world. Loss, violence, and negativity are rampant and we need to focus on the positives and really count our blessings each day.
Blessings to all,
M
I'm sure she wasn't putting down the son's patriotism. She was merely stating that it hit home for her that someone had lost their child. Jeez. Loosen up. Of course his parents are proud of him... all parents are proud of their children.
Michelle,
I understand completely. Since having my own child I've become highly sensitive to such things as well. I think it's a good thing to be sensitive in this desensitized world. Loss, violence, and negativity are rampant and we need to focus on the positives and really count our blessings each day.
Blessings to all,
M
Response from:
Proud Father
(04/25/08 12:00am)
When you say
I'm not going to debate this war here
You ARE bringing it up here. If it's not an issue, then why bring it up?
I'm not going to debate this war here
You ARE bringing it up here. If it's not an issue, then why bring it up?
Response from:
Michelle Donahue Hillison
(04/25/08 3:12am)
Why bring it up? I was trying to keep it from being a debate on the war. I was trying to talk about how I felt SEEING this procession happen right in front of me. I never once made any political comments about it.
This could have been about any family losing a child in any situation. It just happened to come to my attention because it was right in front of me today. The escort was touching, the scene was heartbreaking. That is what I was responding to do.
I didn't want this to become a commentary for or anti the war. The loss of any soldier is a sad thing - no matter how proud, courageous and honorable his service. That isn't a political comment, it is a human issue.
This could have been about any family losing a child in any situation. It just happened to come to my attention because it was right in front of me today. The escort was touching, the scene was heartbreaking. That is what I was responding to do.
I didn't want this to become a commentary for or anti the war. The loss of any soldier is a sad thing - no matter how proud, courageous and honorable his service. That isn't a political comment, it is a human issue.
Response from:
Michelle Donahue Hillison
(04/25/08 3:34am)
Proud Dad, I really don't want to fight with you over this. Do you remember the old scenes from news when the fallen soldier's body comes back from war and the entire small town turns out along the funeral route to honor him?
Truly that scene is more what I was eluding to in my post.
That and being the parent of an only child, it struck me as sad. Our road to parenthood was very tough and I'm sensitive to that idea of losing the one child you have.
Does that make more sense to you?
Truly that scene is more what I was eluding to in my post.
That and being the parent of an only child, it struck me as sad. Our road to parenthood was very tough and I'm sensitive to that idea of losing the one child you have.
Does that make more sense to you?
Response from:
AdoptiveDad
(04/25/08 3:36pm)
Don't bother to be rational with Proud Father, Michelle. He obviously just wants to pick a fight with you. I guess he's in a bad mood or something.
Your post wasn't either anti war or pro war, it was just right.
Your post wasn't either anti war or pro war, it was just right.
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What an insult to parents of children who are VOLUNTARILY serving in the armed forces.
Thanks for your (lack of) support...